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Social Media Tips & Education

Girlfriend Spotlight: Dabney Porte

This week our spotlight is on the original Social Media Girlfriend

~ Dabney Porte ~


Dabney Porte is the President and CEO of Girlfriends Productions, LLC – Social Media Girlfriends. In the past few weeks Dabney has truly shown what she is made of when it comes to social media. Not only has she shown kindness, warmth, integrity and social media manners, but she has shown the best attribute of them all – strength. Dabney Porte embodies woman empowerment and displays it each and every day. She has shown she can walk in HER greatness and OWN her power. THAT is a Social Media Girlfriend!

She is founder of Girlfriends Productions, LLC to include – Social Media Manners (#SmManners) Social Media Girlfriends (#SmGirlfriends) and Slumber Party (#SlumberParty). This girl is on FIRE!


Are you a Social Media Girlfriend?

Show us your badge because we want to spotlight you!

Twitter Seminar ~ #SmManners talks to @NickCicero ~ Lead Social Strategist at @Livefyre


Join us for our Educational Seminar and Simulchat Event!
Social Media Manners®
 Tuesday night at 10pm/et & 7 pm/pt with
Nick Cicero, Lead Social Strategist at Livefyre 
Join Dabney  LIVE on the RADIO and in the nest on Twitter. 
Nick and Dabney will discuss and show YOU how to enhance your online interactions! Livefyre drives real-time conversations with real-time products such as live chats, live blogs, comments, etc., while promoting community engagement.
If you want to enhance your social media influence you should be minding your Social Media Manners®.
LIVE on the air and in the nest ~ Tuesday night at 10pm/et ~ 7pm/pt use our community tag #SmManners!
Social Media Manners® was formed by Dabney, LLC in January of 2010 to provide training and education in the fine art of on-line etiquette within the business community.
New to Twitter?  
You can join us easily by joining us via TweetChat ~ simply go here:
Tweet Us Maybe!

Tweet Us Maybe!

TweetChat is another online screen that will help you streamline the topic you are discussing with the hashtag = #SmManners. There will be other tweeters doing the same for this discussion.
See YOU on the Radio and in the nest!

Twitter Seminar ~ Social Media Manners


Join us weekly for a Twitter Seminar ~ Social Media Manners ~ Tuesday nights at 10pm/et & 7 pm/pt as we discuss
“The Fine Art of the Social Media Dance.”
Dabney Porte is your Ms. Social Media Manners! Join her & learn to enhance your online interactions!
Your Social Media Manners® matter to enhance your social media influence by Minding Your Manners on Social Media.
Social Media Manners® was formed by Dabney, LLC in January of 2010 to provide training and education in the fine art of on-line etiquette within the business community.
LIVE on Twitter ~ Tuesday nights at 10pm/et ~ 7pm/pt use our community tag #SmManners!
New to Twitter?  
You can join us easily by joining us via TweetChat ~ simply go here:
Tweet Us Maybe!

Tweet Us Maybe!

TweetChat is another online screen that will help you streamline the topic you are discussing with the hashtag = #SmManners. There will be other tweeters doing the same for this discussion.

See YOU in the nest!

5 Tips to Connect in an Instant on Social Media (#1 Tip from @RickiLake )


Social media has changed the world forever.  In just 140 characters or an update to your Facebook status, you have the potential to connect with a complete stranger in the same town or across the globe.  In an instant, Friendships are being formed.  Business is taking place.  People are connecting.  And the world will never be the same.


But it isn’t that easy…


Many people are standing on the sidelines of social media, unsure of how to jump into the conversation and contribute their thoughts.  There is uncertainty about how one can form bonds with people they have never met “face to face.”

Are you one of many asking the question, “how?”

That is why we are here and you can know one thing for sure… You are in the right place!  We have teamed up with Ricki Lake, one of the most engaged celebrities on social media, to share 5 tips for connecting with people in an instant on social media.


Watch this video to hear Ricki Lake’s #1 Tip for Connecting on Social Media


2.  Be Respectful.

Leave judgment at the door and respect that other people on social media have beliefs and opinions that are their own.  This is what makes them unique!  Just as in offline relationships, if you want to make friends, you have to be one first.  If you want people to respect you, start by being respectful of them.

3.  Be Inspiring.   

People like social media for many reasons.  Many will share that they feel uplifted and empowered to live their best life by connecting with inspiring and positive people.  If you want to make a lot of friends on social media, be inspiring. Be encouraging.  Be a friend.

4.   Be Generous.  

The more you offer to help others in life, the more “likeable” you will be.  When on social media you can help others by supporting their work.  Take the time to mention people, and give them positive feedback.  When  you re-tweet or share the content of others they feel good and are more likely to appreciate and connect with you.  Remember, “it’s not about me, it’s about we”.

5.  Find a Fun Community! 

Following a hashtag community on Twitter or joining a group or community on Facebook is a great way to connect with people who are like you and who are usually looking for the same type of connection you are looking for.   Twitter and Facebook are the largest gathering of individuals on the planet.  Communities are simply small groups within.  Think of communities on social media as you would small break-out sessions at a very, very large conference.  The name on the door is the community.   Pick the door that tells you that you share common interests with those on the other side.  Then, open the door, step inside and say hello via a tweet or a post on the Facebook wall.  You will be surprised that many are waiting for… you!


If you are looking for a community that is based on friendship and connection, please join Ricki Lake and the Friends of Ricki for a very special announcement and a first hand look at social media connection on Ustream at and using Twitter hashtag #FriendsofRicki at 5pm PST this Wednesday, February 1.  We look forward to seeing you and connecting with you there!


Do you have any ideas or questions about making connections on social media?  Please leave your thoughts in the comments and let’s discuss.

Social Media… I Like You… You Like Me… It’s Easy. by @JerylJagoda

you like me? social media darlings



It’s easy…except when it’s not. Right? Facebook rapidly seems to be taking over the world. But how do you effectively use this powerful platform to build your own visibility and brand awareness? How do you get your audience to know and like YOU?

Whether your business is brand new or has been around for a while, you’ve probably realized at this point that no business can launch or have any real success today without an online presence. There is just no getting around it. The business of Social Media is “return on engagement”. You must actively engage and build relationships in order to get your brand, message and/or product out there.


The #1 business mistake people make on Facebook is assuming that just putting up a fan page and posting content will get them a following. To help you get your 2012 Facebook marketing strategy off on the right foot, here are:



Social Media Darlings’ 6 Steps to a Bang’in Facebook Biz Page:


1. Make sure you have set up a Biz Page, not a personal account! Facebook is clear in their TOS that you cannot use your personal page for solicitation. In fact, once the Facebook elves come across a personal account that is clearly a business page, with examples of sales and marketing on it , they can and often will, take down the page. Your friends (who should be fans) will be lost. If you’ve been guilty of this rather common mistake, I firmly recommend that you switch your page ASAP and ask your friends to migrate over to your new Facebook home. It may seem too painful to even think about this – but imagine how much more it will hurt 3,000 friends/fans from now!


2. Set up a Welcome Page! It is very important for people to get who you are and what you do in an instant. Landing on your wall feed the first time they arrive may not be enough of a     grabber. Your investment in a Welcome Page will come back to you  ten fold. If you don’t want to hire anyone to create this for you, and you have a bit of an artistic flair :) there are tons of user friendly apps out there thatyou can use.


3. Find interesting content that will draw people in. What is your message? Don’t be afraid to give away lots of useful information. Always remember that you have to give it to get it! There are so many content aggregators out there. Subscribe and follow and when something hits you that you are passionate about share it!


4. Ask questions to get a conversation started. Don’t just post content… make a statement, then ask for opinions, suggestions, answers, anecdotes- anything! Because you must…


5. ENGAGE-ENGAGE-ENGAGE! LISTEN to what your audience is saying and what they need to know so you can give them what they want in your response. All anybody really wants is to be heard. Hear them, respond and you have a brand new fan.


6. Don’t sell from your page. Offer links that Do Not go to your website or to what you are selling, but rather lead to pertinent information of interest to your followers. Readers must trust you first. Soliciting can then be approached through tabs and focused landing pages, NOT ON YOUR WALL!


I can not stress enough the importance of you or the client you are working with getting out there and engaging with your target audience. If you are speaking for your client in their engagement, you better make sure you know their voice. The more they intereact themselves the better.


There are thousands of groups,twitter communities and #chats to engage with, find the ones that speak to you or that your why hooks into. I am, of course, partial to Social Media Girlfriends ( and not just because I am “Social Media Girlfriend Of The Month”, thank you @DabneyPorte and @Mamabritt, it has truly been an honor! But because groups like #smgirlfriends are priceless for networking, building engagement and helping you to become a formidable internet presence.


Don’t just rely on a Facebook Biz page. Get on out there on Twitter- start a #chat for your specialty. Don’t forget Google+, don’t worry we are all circularly challenged- get over it. What is it Van Halen said? You might as well Jump!


Social Media is about giving: Give and You Will Get Back. I highly suggest that you read Bob Burg’s “The Go Giver”. It totally changed the way I handle my business. Social Media has shown me the power of giving. And I have gotten back so much more than I would have ever expected. Jeryl- Out


Jeryl Jagoda is founder and CEO of Social Media Darlings- Dragging you TWEET FIRST into the Social Media Frontier.

Girlfriends Talk Radio: Facebook Pages and Engagement


We had so much fun in this episode of Girlfriends Talk Radio!


As Dabney was just coming back to the light (from one of those killer flu bugs), she shared a story of a child from her son’s high school who was expelled for a tweet!


Remember, we need to keep our kids safe, but we also need to make sure they have the information they need to use social media appropriately.  Their digital footprint is permanent, just like their school records… so it is our job to stay informed and active.  Listen to the show to find out some tips and if you want more information on keeping your kids safe online, listen to this episode of Bruce Sallan’s radio show where Dabney and I go in depth with experts Andrea Vahl and Tshaka Armstrong about Online Safety.


Back to this show – we were delighted to be joined by our Girlfriend of the Month, Jeryl Jagoda of Social Media Darlings, who shared some great tips about Facebook Pages with us.  Who knew this timeline thing was going to be THE thing on Facebook?  So interesting! 


Don’t worry, I haven’t spoiled it all for you here, you still have plenty of fun left as you listen to the second episode of Girlfriends Talk Radio.  Please let us know your thoughts or questions in the comments and… Enjoy!




Introducing the #BoysOnTwitter


We wanted to thank our “boyfriends” on Twitter for all of the support they have given our community since we began bringing Global Brilliance Together!


After hearing much feedback in regard to our boyfriends feeling “left out” of our community, we also decided to form a special place just for them!


Please welcome our #BoysOnTwtter and visit them often in the community The Social Media Man Cave or #SmManCave!


We hope we didn’t leave anyone out of this movie and we of course, will have a sequel in the future.  So, please let us know if you would like to be included.


We always welcome our #BoysOnTwitter in our #SmGirlfriends Twitter Community and look forward to many fun plans we have in merging our communities of magnificence and fabulous!




Dabney and Britt

All You Need to Know About Relationships and Social Media, You Learned on the Playground!


Be Nice

Many of us heard this often as children. As we played on the playground with our friends, most of us were simply told, “Be Nice.” What does being “nice” mean? Think about it. Are you kind, friendly and courteous to others?

To be “nice” is to be kind to others. On the playground as children, most of us learned a great deal about being “nice”.

It is important to remember that you are defining your brand in a very social environment that reaches many more individuals then you can imagine. Know this for sure; if you are nice to others, you will find success.



Respect. It is a small word that is powerful beyond measure. On the playground as children, we were taught to respect others. We learned to respect our friend’s personal space, property, privacy, values and individuality.

Take these childhood lessons learned with you as you engage with others on Social Media. If someone is not engaging or has upset you, do not address this publicly. If you are marketing a product, do not spam others. If you do not agree with someone’s politics or religion keep your thoughts to yourself. If you must share your opinion or emotions, do so within a private email or direct message. Respect your online connections. They are real people, in real life. The only difference is you are engaging in real life online.



On the playground we were told to share the jump rope, the swings, the slide, the ball, etc. If you were a good “sharer” you may have experienced how wonderful it felt to share with others. Undoubtedly in doing so, you made others feel good about you too.

Make this happen within your online engagements. Share the posts and work of your followers. Leave comments on their site. When you validate others, you send out the energy that you are kind. This will attract many new followers who engage in the same man­ner.

Look around, The Law of Attraction is operating right in your nest of fabulous.


Say Thank You

When someone was nice to us on the playground as a child, we were taught to say thank you. It is very important to do the same on Social Media. When someone adds you as a connection, mentions you or validates you in anyway, say thank you.

These two words establish trust and likability. Remember, both are critical to brand reputation and to building both business and personal relationships.


No Yelling

When on the playground, we were allowed to have fun and let loose. The same is appropriate at times, on Social Media forums.

However, just as we were told to not “yell” or “scream” on the playground, we must keep our “voice” down on Twitter. Yelling on Social Media is seen when someone uses all capital or bold lettering. Be careful with this. Many will take offense. No Yelling. Ever.


Help Others

When you were young, did you help another child on the playground when they fell, or did you look at them thinking, “He should have known not to play like that on the jungle gym.”

On Social Media, many untrained and uncertain individuals are joining every day. If you are sent spam, auto Direct Messages or a Facebook friend request without a note, don’t be too harsh. Try to recall the many mistakes you made when the world of Social Media was new to you. Stop and offer help.

My desire and mission is to educate others on the “Fine Art of the Social Media Dance.” This strong desire to help others is the very reason I developed my brand, seminars and trainings.  For those of us who are experienced and well versed on the DO’s and DO NOT’s of Social Media, we must remember that just as earlier set­tlers defined the USA Territories, we are driving today’s “wagon train” and have discovered, developed and defined the social norms for Social Media. Let’s circle our wagons and protect, educate and help our new friends and connections.


Ask for Help

Just as we were told to help others who need us on the playground of our childhood, we were also told to ask for help when we need it.

Reach out to your connections and mentors. Ask questions and seek advice when you need it. If you have been playing “nice” and established your likability and trust reputation, your followers will not hesitate to help. I have been assisted when I have needed it. All I need to say was “Can anyone answer this question….?” I continue to be amazed at how supportive my connections are on Social Media.

It is however, very important to remember when asking for help, that you do not expect or demand free consulting services. Asking a simple question that requires a simple response is appropriate. A “picking someone’s brain” session via the phone or email should be paid for. Taking advantage of someone is never a benefit to your success on Social Media. Remember to respect your connections.


Include Others

Do you recall jumping rope or playing ball on the playground with your core group of friends, when out of the corner of your eye you saw a class­mate sitting alone? We were taught to include that child and we must remember to do so when on Social Media.

Introduce a new follower that you respect to others. If someone joins in a conversation, respond and welcome them to do so. Remember, your core group of connections on Social Media, once never was. At one point, each of us sat alone in our nest. Reach out, engage and include both your core connections and your new ones.


No Gossip

Think about it. It is never acceptable to gossip about another person online or off. Many “fights” on the play­ground of our youth resulted from such poor behavior, and many have occurred on Social Media as well. To engage, repeat or repost gossip, ill will, or any communication that is hearsay is not only very poor manners, it is against the law to slander others.

Only re post or restate positive statements of others. If you see something negative stated, ask yourself how you feel as you read it. Most of us will have an uneasy reaction. When you repeat such statements, you will have many feel uneasy of you. As a result, you may as well toss the adjectives likeability and trust out of the list of words many may use to describe you.

It is simple, if you have nothing nice to say, do not say, tweet or post anything at all.


No Cussing

Just as we were taught not to gossip about others, we would certainly have faced consequences if we were to use foul language and profanity on the playground. As adults, we are responsible for our actions and reactions to others.

If you engage using profanity on Social Media, you will alienate, offend and loose followers. Trust me. It is not pro­fes­sional, courteous or appealing. I have read posts that have offered very timely and important information that I have been unable to recommend to others. Even a dash of profane language will stop me in my tracks.

Expressing yourself as “you” is important, but if “you” use profanity in your daily life, do not do so on Social Media. Ask yourself, “Would say that word out loud at a networking event?” Most of us would answer no.

Hopefully, you are making new connections each day on Social Media. If so, each post is a first glance and first impression of you to your new followers. Keep the foul language out of your nest.


No Bullies

The Bully of our playground days is often the same bully who acts passively and/or overtly aggressive on Social Media platforms.

You may be observed as a bully if you demand others to friend or follow you, are rude in your engaging and whenever you act as though you have more power then someone else. I have seen this happen often on Social Media platforms. I have observed people publicly announce many rude statements directed at individuals made in the public stream. I will often block anyone who exhibits such behavior or makes statements of others that are in anyway negative. It is toxic and bully like.

You cannot change a bully. I recommend you do not engage or reply to rude behavior. You can only control your reaction to such behavior. Simply hit the block or un-friend button. You are in control of what you see and with whom you engage.  Keep your nest clear of negative clutter.  This will leave room for connections that are positive and supportive.


Take a Time Out

When we were tired, angry, or feeling badly on the playground, most of us were told to take a time out. If you are feeling negative within your day, take a time out from Social Media.


Word of mouth has gone global; do not share with the world how badly you are feeling. Social Media is not therapy. We are at a networking event and/or social gathering.  Ask yourself if you would attend an offline event feeling this way and vent inappropriately there? If you would not, do not engage on Social Media.

Let’s enjoy our playground of today! We may not have posted rules, but we do have many lessons learned that we may implement within our online community conversations.  Play nice and you will build a circle of friends, business partners and clients who know, like and trust you!

For more education on Social Media Manners®, join the chat #SMman­ners held each Tues­day at 10pm/est live on Twitter

The Social Media Girlfriends Play in Los Angeles!

This is what happens when Social Media Girlfriends meet up for a fun night of tweet chats and hugs at the Intercontinental Hotel in Los Angeles.


Collaboration and Mutual Influence

Guest Post by Kelly Kim of Twylah

When Dabney Porte and Britt Michaelian asked me to do a guest post on collaboration, I was thrilled.  Not only do I love the topic, I knew it was a timely one.


This month alone we watched the London riots break out, the American debt crisis blow up, and reports of extreme weather and impending natural disaster.


With all that’s going on in our world, it seems pretty clear that collaboration is no longer an option. 


This is not political or moral position.  It’s simply an elegant if not obvious solution – a return to a more basic state and a more civil time.  Collaboration is our natural way of being after all.  In fact, it’s nature’s way of being.


We are birthed from “collaboration,” and in ashes and dust, we return to feed the soil.  Plants and trees create the oxygen we breathe, and in turn they eat up the carbon dioxide we produce.


The rain forest is not conflicted or confused by the concept of collaboration, nor does the rain forest need to convince itself that collaboration is necessary or valuable.  It just does it.  It just is it.


Human beings are the only ones who insist on pretending that collaboration is an option or something to aspire to when we have the time or after we’ve been through enough training seminars.


It is only human beings who recoil at the thought of collaboration.  We almost fear the perceived loss of control that comes with allowing ourselves to be truly influenced by the unique wisdom, perspective, and ideas of another.


Similarly, we fear our own power to influence another.  Who are we to know what’s right?  Will we be blamed if it doesn’t turn out as planned?  Do we really want that responsibility?


And what is collaboration about if it is not about allowing others to influence us with their ideas even as we summon the courage to take a stand for our own?


The answer, of course, is conscious collaboration, which includes conscious choices of our partners in the collaboration process and conscious choices during each and every moment of the collaboration process itself.  Indeed, it is the depth of consciousness within our collaborations that creates fair and equitable circumstances, outcomes, and solutions for the benefit of all. 


Collaboration is our natural state.  And in this recognition – the recognition of what is always, already happening all around us – we can begin to make conscious, healthy choices.  And in our healthy and conscious choices in favor of collaboration, new possibilities arise.


And isn’t that the point of collaborating after all?


How do you feel about collaborating?  More importantly, are you doing it and how?



Even after all this time,
the sun never says to the earth,
“You owe me.”
Look what happens with a love like that.
It lights the whole sky.





Author bio:


Kelly Kim is an entrepreneur, wife, and mother of 2.  You can find her at

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